Monday, November 19, 2007
my issues
so to start off last weekend i went to burlington and while waiting for justin to get done with somethings he had to do i decided that i would go and visit my friends Jodie and Joanne. well when i got to their house Joanne answered the door and i asked for Jodie. her eyes started to tear as she told me that Jodie was dead. i didnt believe her so i smiled and said for real wheres Jodie. Joanne explained to me that Jodie (whos 38) had died from a heart attack last tuesday. i couldnt believe it. i just saw him not to long ago and hes gone. i have been having the worst time ever all weekend and today at work i had to come home because i couldnt handle it. tonight is the funeral so mom is going to take me up there. i mean Jodie was one of my best friends who lived there and now hes gone. he has 3 kids one is my age he is taking it alright but not to well. his daughter is 7 and she looked at Joanne and said "that means daddy is going to miss Christmas this year wont he" and then their youngest is 5 and when Joanne told him he is going to go stay with their grandparents he looked at her and said "you arent going to die too are you mommy" i mean just when she told me that it killed me. i havent been taking it to well. it made me realize that anything can happen at any moment and no one would see it comin. it hurts inside and i dont want to show how it is effecting me but i know that i at least need to talk about it so i figure who would know whats best for me more than you all do. i have been also hanging out with someone again and i just dont get why i get lectured and stuff by everyone because of him. i mean i know why i just dont see why no one will listen to my side. Nate is who i have been hanging out with and he has changed alot since last time i hung out with him. he doesnt do anything any more and when im around him all my problems disappear well anyway i dont know where i was going with the nate thing i just thought i would share the issues ive been having lately and i just wanted to say how mcuh i am really going to miss Jodie its hurting me bad. i can hardly sleep and when i eat and i think about him i get sick. well i love you guys and thanks for listening to me.
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4 comments:
Sam,
Remember that you have a family that loves you, and we want to help.
I don't know what I can do to make things feel better for you, but you have my love and support.
If you need anything, let me know.
Love, Aunt Cindy
PS:
Do you remember the toe rings? I was looking in my jewelry drawer the other day and I found Ruth's and mine. Or were they hand rings? I don't remember, but I do remember the fun that we had that year. :)
Sam, I'm very sorry that you have lost such a good friend, but I'm going to be cliche and say just try to remember what a good friend he was and don't dwell on his loss but on the life he had. And also, I'm going to give you a HUGE FREAKIN' HUG in just two days! Yay, I can't wait! :)
Sam, You could talk to any of us at the house if you were home more often. And yes I know, I'm not home much either. But Family is just as important as hanging out with friends....and I'm sorry Jodie died, he was a good man and I will miss him to even though I only met him like twice, but he was a good guy. See ya around
Hi Sam,
I left you a long heartfelt note earlier today but it looks like it didn't post successfully!!
I'm really sorry about your friend. You must know by now how much we love you and support you through the grief you are feeling.
I am thinking of you (and wishing that I could remember exactly what I said last time.....) Love, Aunt Kathy
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